About This Blog

This is where I post my original works - stories, poems, proses, essays, etcetera. I own everything that's written here. If you want to post my works somewhere, please give credit to me.

Original stories are stories whose characters came from my mind. I own the character for those posts that have this tag.

Fan fic are my stories which stars my favorite Asian stars/anime characters/drama characters. I only own the stories, but not the characters (I do wish I own Calvin Chen and the rest of Fahrenheit... lol)

Roses are my short proses/stories. it may be written in first person's view or thrid person's view. It's just a narrative prose.

One-shots are my series of stories that are one chapter long. These are also tag as roses.

Actually, I was planning to make 25 short stories before my 25th birthday (which have already passed) and unfortunately, I wasn't too successful in making 25 short stories. I was panning to call it 25 roses, hence the tag roses here in my blog.

Anyways, if you want to read just one story, click on the title below and then start reading from below.

Happy Reading!


I'm trying to figure out how I could highlight the entries here and copy, but I am not that knowledgaeble with HTML. So, while I'm trying to figure things out, if anyone wanted a soft copy of the stories here for reading purposes only, you can shoot me an email at tamed_soul@hotmail.com


My Tumblr
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Anna. Again
Chico Garcia
Story Weaver
Story Princess
Kilig Story Writer
Kiwi Flight

Completed Stories

All For You
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15

The Man-Hater
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12

My Two Love, My True Love
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3
Chapter 4 Chapter 4 Chapter 6
Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9
Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12
Chapter 13 Chapter 14 Chapter 15
Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18
Chapter 19 Chapter 20 Chapter 21 Chapter 22 Chapter 23
Chapter 24 Chapter 25 Chapter 26
Chapter 27 Chapter 28 Chapter 29
Chapter 30 Chapter 31 Chapter 32
Chapter 33 Chapter 34 Chapter 35
Chapter 36 Chapter 37 Chapter 38

Me And The Boy Next Door
Round 1 Round 2 Round 3
Round 4 Round 5 Round 6
Round 7 Round 8 Round 9
Round 10 Round 11 Round 12
Round 13 Round 14 Round 15
Round 16 Round 17 Round 18
Round 19 Round 20 Round 21
Round 22 Round 23 Round 24
Round 25 Round 24 Round 27
Round 28 Round 29 Round 30
Round 31 Round 32 Round 33
Round 34 Round 35 Round 36
Round 37 Round 38 Round 39
Last Round

99 Paper Cranes Special: Valentine's Day
99 Paper Cranes

Ongoing Stories

Paper Star
99 Love Notes
Me And My Gay Boss
Always and Forever
The Stone Keeper
I Will Wait For You In Heaven
Paper Planes
You Are My Song
A Game Of Destiny
10 Days
Love Me Again
Say That You Love Me
Roses For You
Love Starts Here
So It's You


Wedding Picture
Christmas Card

Songs And Stories
By Heart

Coming Soon

My Fallen Star
Chasing Prince Charming
Paper Roses
In His Eyes
A Fairy Tale Love Story
Princess, Princess
The Silent Guardian
My Dear Heart

Let`s Talk





Tuesday, May 8, 2012
I'm officially closing this blog

I wont be updating here anymore. I wont be updating my hanging storied anymore. I'll still decide if I will ulitmately delete this blog. Thanks for all the support you've given me for the past 3 years. Signing off, weepingangel

posted by kC @ 9:38 AM  0 Comments

Saturday, October 30, 2010
Red Eye

Red Eyes

It was midnight.

The wind blew violently. The branches of a tree nearby was swaying with the strong wind, making a knocking sound by the window. With those said, Aaron covered himself with a blanket, trying his best not to be scared.

It was the night before the Halloween, and here he is, lying on his bed, scaring the hell out of himself because of those scary thoughts. Stupid Chun for making him watch those gory movies the night before. Stupid Calvin for making him watch those horror flicks that afternoon. Stupid Jiro and Danson for telling him those scary ghosts stories before he went to bed. And stupid him for being such a scaredy cat.
He could hear footsteps by the hall. He chose to ignore it, knowing that it might be Chessie, their assistant. Chessie had this habit of going out of her room at midnight to check on them. But then, he realized that Chessie is out on vacation.

“Shit!” he thought. It couldn’t be Chun, he thought. Chun flew back to Brunei that afternoon. Danson and Jiro were partying again at a bar somewhere. Calvin had a date with Hebe, whom he finally convinced to go out with him. He closed his eyes tightly, and forced himself to sleep so that he could ignore the footsteps. But then, the footsteps became louder. The wind became much stronger. And the branch from the tree is knocking down his window. “Damn it! Don’t scare me, whichever supernatural being you are!” he thought.

He sat up on his bed, and looked at his door. He could see the knob being turned, as if someone is opening it. “Damn you, ghost! I should have gone home tonight instead of being home alone in this apartment!” he thought. The door slowly creaked open. “No… don’t hurt me! Take everything you want, just don’t hurt me!” he said in a scared voice. The door finally opened. A girl whose face is covered with her long hair, came in. She is clad in white dress. Then, she walked up to him. “No… don’t take me… I’m a good boy…” he said as if he was crying. But the girl did not heed his plea. He certainly heard about the ghost in this house. Jiro told him about the girl whom he sees roaming the house at this time (he had a third eye). “No… don’t… please…” Aaron pleaded again. Still, no reply from the girl.

The girl came up to her really close. He moved back from his bed, till he fell from it. He crawled back, till there was nowhere else to hide. “No!” He shouted, shielding himself from her. The girl moved her face close to her, and he saw how red her eyes are. “Sadako, no! I still have six days left since I watched your video!” Aaron shouted. He closed his eyes, and made a cross position of his arms.
“Aaron?” a scary voice said. “No! Please!” he cried. “Aaron…” she said in yet another scary voice. “Take all that you want, just don’t kill me!” Aaron said. “Aaron… can I borrow your eye drop?” she asked. Aaron got confused. He opened his eyes, and saw Chessie laughing at him.

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posted by kC @ 9:14 AM  0 Comments

Saturday, October 9, 2010
Say That You Love Me - Chapter 12

I Need You

Your hug
Your touch
Your smile
Your tears
Your breath
Your look
Everything about you...
I can't keep my heart from being silent...


“I miss you so much that it hurts.”

He walked up to her, and gave her a hug. As he touched her body, a lump was formed on her throat. The tears involuntarily fell from her eyes. “All I wanted is to find time with my best friend... and... and you can't give that to me. Why does he have to take you away from me? Why did you have to forget me, Ella?” he asked. She opened her mouth to speak, but she felt too weak to even answer.

She wanted to say that she didn't forget him.
He was the one who forgot.
She wanted to say that she didn't let him take her away from him.
She let her feelings take herself away from her best friend.
She wanted to say that she wanted to take back the lost time with him.
He was to busy to even find time for her.
She wanted to say that she miss him too, and it hurts more than he feels.
But it will only give way to what her heart truly feels.

Chun released her, and she immediately turned her back on him, so that he won't see the tear in her eyes. And she successfully hid those tears from him. “This is not a good time to be mushy, Chun. Finals are coming soon, and I'm really busy right now.” she said in a stern voice. His shoulder slumped upon hearing how emotionless she is towards him now. Before, when they have not seen each other even for a day, she would run up to him, give him a bear hug, and tell him how much she missed him. Now, the Ella before her seems not to care about him anymore. “Ella...” he said in a low voice.

She wiped the tears from her eyes, and faced him again. This time, her face seemed serious, as if masking how she truly feels. “Aren't you supposed to be working on your grades as well? How can you get in to that university and take the same major as me? You know that the standards at St. Thomas University is so high, especially at the Architecture department. I think you're slacking off.” she said. “Can you for once stop obsessing about college, Ella? We have to talk. We haven't talked for ages.” Chun said in a frustrated tone. “All I can see is that you're spending way too much time with Tiffany and not working on your grades, Chun. I'm not like you. Even though I am dating Lego, it doesn't mean that I'm forgetting my studies.”
“Stop taking about it, Ella. Please...”
“I'm busy. You should be too. Why am I the only one who cares about this whole shit?”
“Oh, maybe you realized you didn't want to be an architect anymore. It's OK, I understand. Sp, are you gonna take the same major as Tiff now?”
“Yeah, or maybe you decided not to go that university anymore, huh?”
“Ella! I said stop it!”

He pulled Ella to him, his forehead leaning to hers. His finger silenced her lips. “Didn't you just realize what I just said?” he asked in a low, hurt tone. “I missed you... I missed my best friend... I missed spending after school hours with her. I missed having long talks with her about our day in school... about our dreams, about our crazy thoughts. I wanted to ask her, ' how are you doing?' 'how are you and Lego' 'is Lego treating you good?' 'if he hurt you or make you cry, I will definitely break his neck'. I want to tell her, 'hey, remember that dream house you sketched a few years back? Promise me I'll be the one who'll build it' or 'hey, I saw the cotton candy man a while ago at the park, and I remember how you looked like when you choked on the cotton candy we bought from him back in 3rd grade'.”

She looked into Chun's eyes, and she could see his pain. She felt guilty, because she caused that pain to him. “I... I just want us to talk... that's all. I feel that since you and Lego have been together, you have been neglecting me, not wanting to spend time with me. All I'm asking is just a minute of your time...” he said. She wanted to hug him tight, and say sorry for avoiding him.

“You and Tiffany had a fight, didn't you?” she asked. Chun was surprised at her question, too surprised that he let her go. “What made you think that we fought?” he asked in an angry tone. “Because you need me.”
“I have always needed you!”
“Yeah, you do. When you have problems, I'm the one who always fix it. That's my role in your life, right?”
“Do you really think of me that way? Do you think I always come to you whenever I wanted something from you? How can you think lowly of me?”
“Because all my life, it has always been like that, Chun!”

He stared at her sadly as he brushed his hair with his fingers. “You're right... I've always depended too much on you... especially whenever I have problems. Don't worry, I'll fix this on my own, do that you won't have to worry about me anymore...” he said. Weakly, Chun turned his back on her, and walked away. She could only watch sadly as he walked away. She pushed him away again and she knew it was wrong. She wanted to follow him and apologize, but she can't bring herself to. “I'm so sorry, Chun...” she said softly. “I'm so sorry...”


Lego stood at the center of the empty hall. He clutched his back as he looked at his watch, waiting for someone to come. Then, he heard footsteps. He looked by the door, and he saw Chun walking up to me. “What do you want to talk about, that we have to talk here, and not at the classroom?”Lego asked as soon as Chun got near him. Chun took an envelope from his back pocket, and handed it to him. “You dropped this.” he said. Lego looked at the envelope, and was shocked to see that it was hi acceptance letter from Boston University. “Congratulations for passing. So, you're going to stufy there?” Chun asked. Lego sighed, and snatched the letter from his hand. “You read this?” he asked angrily. “I was curious.”

He put the letter inside his bag, and attempted to leave, but Chun stopped him by holding his arm. “Does Ella know?” Chun asked worriedly. “This isn't something that I have to tell her right away.” Lego said. Chun glared at him. “My best friend is your girlfriend...” Chun hissed at him. Lego glared back at him. “That's the point. You are just Ella's best friend. I am her boyfriend, and I will tell her things when I want to tell her too, at the right time, at the right moment. This isn't something that you can interfere with.” Lego said in a matter-of-fact tone. “If it's something that will break Ella's heart, then I have every right to interfere.” Chun replied in a firm tone. Lego could only give him a smirk. “Why do you care? If I hurt her or not... it's none of your business... if I stay and be with her, or leave her and study abroad, you don't give a damn.” Lego said.

Chun tightened his grip on him, glaring angrily at his friend. “Ella has the right to know what your decision is.”
“Why do you care? You have already abandoned her, right?”
Chun was taken aback by what he said. “I never abandoned my best friend.” he said, turning away from Lego. “Did you know that she love vanilla ice cream?” Lego said. This time, Chun faced him with a puzzled look on his face. “It's her favorite, right? But she still orders strawberry ice cream. Why? Because of you. Because she knew you would want to have a taste of it, even if you're allergic to it.” Lego said. Slowly, Chun let go of his arm. “She still thinks snowpuff from time to time. She's the dog you gave her right? Have you seen the sad look on her face whenever you wait outside the school gate for Tiffany? When she comes for you and the two of you leave without even waving goodbye to her? Have you seen how frustrated she is trying to answer her math assignment without anyone's help? You never knew a thing about your best friend anymore, Chun. You know why? Because you were too blinded by Tiffany that you barely noticed her existence.” Lego said.

He felt guilty after hearing what Lego said. He's right, he have taken Ella for granted. “And do you know why she chose me? Because I was giving her the attention she needed from you. So don't tell me that I'll be hurting Ella if I leave. Don't assume that if I leave, Ella will cry her heart out. Believe me, she's stronger that you think think she is. And she'll understand if I will tell her that I have to leave...” Lego added. He gave Chun one last glarem and then left him to ponder about all the things he said.


Saturday came.

Ella and Lego walked inside the cafe, and found Tiffany and Chun together. “Finally! You guys are here!” Tiffany said. She jumped out of her chair, and gave Ella a hug. Ella just smiled faintly at her. “So, shall we go now? Movie starts in 30 minutes!” Tiffany said excitedly. Ella just nodded her head. They followed Chun and Tiffanny outside then they entered the mall. Ella sighed as they tailed the two. “Why did we agree to go with them?” she asked in an irritated tone. Lego just looked at her, and sighed. Then, he forced a smile on his face. “Hey, this is gonna be fun, baby. We haven't actualy went out on a real date, and a double date with Chun and Tiffany could be fun.” Lego said. “I'm not comfortable around them... it's like they are so caught up with their own little world, as if no one ever exists.” she commented. “Or is it because you're jealous of Tiffany?” Lego asked.

Ella paused, and looked at Lego. “You don't have to deny it Ella. You still love Chun. It's not easy to forget your love for him in a span of two weeks.” Lego said. She looked away from him, feeling guilty because of what he said. “I'm trying my best to stay away from him.”
“Sometimes avoiding the one you love just to forget your feelings for him does not help at all. Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
“I don't love him anymore.”
“Then can you tell me that you love me?”

Ella looked at him again. She stared at him for a long time. As she was about to open her mouth to say something, Tiffany called them. “Ella, Lego! Come on, we've got the tickets!” Tiffany said. Lego could only sigh in frustration. “Let's not talk about this first, Ella. Can we enjoy this date first? I know you're not comfortable being with them, but this is also our date...” he said. “I'm sorry...” she said as she lowered her head. Lego lifter her chin, and smiled at her. “Forgiven. Come on, let's go, all right?” he said. Ella smiled at him, and nodded her head.

They decided to buy some popcorn before getting inside the cinema. “One cheddar cheese flavored popcorn please!” Both Chun and Ella said at the same time. They looked at each other, then Ella became awkward and looked away from him. “Ca you put in an extra butter and flavor on the other popcorn?” Chun said. Upon hearing that, Ella looked at him, and glared at him. She hated him for knowing what she liked with her popcorn. “Here you go.” the attendant said. They both reached for their money, and as Ella was about to pay for it, Chun gave the attendant the money. “This is for the two popcorn.” he said. “I didn't ask you to pay for my popcorn.” Ella said in an annoyed tone. “Well, you're welcome.” he said. She snatched the popcorn, and stomped her way inside the cinema. Chun could only shake his head as he watched her best friend get annoyed with him.

After watching the movie, they went to the department store to buy their dresses for the graduation ball. Tiffany took a black haltered gown from the rack, and tried it on. While waiting for Tiffany, Chun was looking around. He noticed that Ella was having a hard time finding a dress for herself. Then, at the corner of his eye, he saw a pink off-shoulder dress for her. He took it, and then walked up to her.

“Try this one.”

Ella looked at the two guys beside her, who was handing her a dress. On her left is Lego, who is handing her a peach tube dress, and on her right is Chun, who have a pink off-shoulder dress on his hand. Ella chose to ignore Chun, and took Lego's dress. “Thanks, baby!” she said. She walked towards the fitting room, and left the two alone. “Nice choice, by the way.” Lego said. Chun glared at him. “That dress is too revealing for her. Ella never wear those kind of dress!” Chun said. Lego just smirked at him. “Then, shall we wait till she's in that dress?” Lego said.

Minutes have passed, and Tiffany came out of the fitting room to show them how she looked like in her gown. “What do you say, hon?” she asked as she twirled around. Chun gave her a satisfied smile. “You look great on that gown.” he said. Tiffany smiled at him. “Thanks baby! Where's Ella?” she asked. “She's inside, trying out a dress.” Lego said.

After a while, Ella got out of the fitting room. “How do I look?” she asked. Chun looked her way, and in an instant, he was mesmerized with the way his best friend looked. “You look great! You... you look so sexy!” Lego commented. Upon hearing that, Chun looked angirly at Lego. He felt that he is now respecting Ella with his comment. “Go and get another dress. It's too revealing for you.” Chun ordered. Ella ignored him. “I'm going to get this one then.” she said. “Ella! You can't do that! It's too revealing for you!” Chun said angrily. Ella acted as if she didn't heard him, and went back to the fitting room to change.

There was an awkward silence between the two for a long time after that. “What's wrong?” Tiffany aksed. “My girlfriend seems not to be in the mood.” Lego answered. Chun could only glare at him. “It's your fault. You shouldn't have given her that dress.” Chun said. It was Ella's turn to glare at him. “Who gave you the right to blame my boyfriend for every action I'm doing?” she asked him. Chun looked angrily at him. “I can't understand you. Why are you acting as if you're not enjoying our company?”
“I certainly enjoy Tiffany and Lego's company, thank you very much.”
“You're acting as if I don't exist!”
“Oh, you do exist? Am I ignoring you?”
“You've been like that since we bought popcorn! What the hell is wrong with you? Is it wrong now to tell the popcorn guy how you want your popcorn to be?”
“Did I give you the permission to?”

Tiffany's eyes shifted from Chun to Ella and back as they snap back at each other. “Are you fighting?” she asked. “No!” the two of them shouted angrily at her. This shocked Tiffany the most. Ella glared at him upon seeing her reaction. “What?” she asked. “Who told you to shout at my girlfriend?”
“Oh, am I the only one who shouted at Tiffany like that?”
“Chun, Ella, stop it. You're acting like kids!” Lego said.
“I don't understand you anymore, Ella...” Chun said.
“Who told you to understand me, anyways?” Ella said.
“I don't find a reason for you to act this way towards me, Ella...” Chun said.

Ella folded her arms, and took a deep breath. “If you have a problem with me, then just tell me, will you?” Chun said. Ella gave him one last glare. Then, she stood up from her seat and walked out to the street. “Chun! Why are you like that to Ella!” Tiffany said angrily. Chun couldn't answer her. “I'm going after her.” Lego said. As lego was about to stand up, Chun got out of his seat, and decided to follow her. Lego could only watch sadly as Chun chase her best friend.

“Ella! Ella!” Chun shouted at her. Ella is still pissed off at him. She did not head his call, and continued on her way. “Ella Chen! Stop walking, will you!” Chun shouted at her. “Go away!” Ella shouted back at him. She made another step, and was about to cross the the street, when a car sped her way. She almost got hit by it, but Chun was quick and pulled her back to the safe side of the street. Soon, she found herself in his arms. She looked up at him, and she saw him staring at her with tenderness and concern. His gaze could only melt her heart, but she knew she have to keep her anger for Chun still, so that he will stay away from her. “What are you thinking, crossing the street like that? What if that car hit you? Do you know what would happen to you if you got hit by that car?!” Chun said in a worried tone. Ella pushed Chun away from her with all her might. “Stop caring for me, all right?!” Ella shouted at him. Chun was surprised at what she said. “I don't need you, Chun! Not anymore. I don't need you to protect me, or to tell me what the hell to do with my life. I don't need you, period. Stop acting like you're my big brother, and just go on with your life!” she shouted again.

She turned her back on her, and folded her arms. She wished that what she said or did would be enough for Chun to leave her alone. Then suddenly, she felt his arms wrap around her. “I do... I need you...” he whispered to her. With that, she felt herself stiffen. Her body seems to have melted when he touched her. “If you leave this world, then what about me? I don't know why you're mad at me, but even if you hate me forever, I... I could never leave you like this... I would still need you even if you don't need me anymore...” he said. She turned to face him. She bit her lips as she noticed the tear in his eyes. Then, Chun pulled her into a hug.

Read Next ChapterRead Previous Chapter

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posted by kC @ 11:07 AM  0 Comments

Saturday, October 2, 2010
Say That You Love Me - Chapter 11

Heart’s Longing

I said to myself that I will learn to love him
That he’s more than enough for me
Because he loved me like no other…
Why does my eyes kept on looking for you?
Why does my lips kept on speaking your name?
Why does this heart only beats for you?


He took a deep breath, and then reached for the hand of the girl walking beside him. He looked at her, and shyly smiled. They’ve been together for a week now, and he can’t believe that he’s finally with the girl he likes the most. He felt like the luckiest guy on earth, having to walk side by side with this angel. She looked up at him, and let out a cheeky smile. “Ice cream?” she asked. He let out a laugh. As always, Ella would ask him to treat her for some ice cream. “You bet.” He said.

Lego and Ella sat on their usual spot at the ice cream parlor. Secretly, he would glance at Ella as she takes her time reading the menu. “Strawberry ice cream… definitely, it’s gonna be strawberry ice cream again.” He thought with a smile. Whenever they stop by for ice cream, even if Ella is tempted to taste all those wonderful ice cream flavors, she always ends up ordering her classic favorite. Then, the waitress came, and took their orders. “Strawberry ice cream for me.” Ella said. Lego could only smile, for he got it right again. “And you, Lego?” she asked. “I’ll have choco mint this time.” He said.

After a while, their orders arrived. Lego watched as Ella excitedly dug in to her favorite ice cream. “Why strawberry?” he asked. Ella looked at him, puzzled at his question. “I know it’s a lame question… but each time we come here to eat, you always order that flavor. So, why is strawberry your favorite?” he asked. “I like color pink.” She said as she put a spoonful in her mouth. Then, she giggled. “Actually, my favorite really is vanilla.”
“So why do you always order strawberry?”
“Chun likes strawberry ice cream. But he’s allergic to it… so whenever we eat ice cream, he always order strawberry for me just so he could have a little of it. I grew to like this flavor anyways.”

Lego felt his smile slowly disappearing from his face, and Ella failed to notice is. “So… Chun likes strawberry ice cream?” he asked in a low voice. “He likes the fact that it’s pink.” She said with a giggle. Even if they’re together now, he felt that Chun is getting in his way to be much closer to Ella. He will always be that ghost that’s always between them. He felt a lump on his throat as he forced a smile on his lips. “I like strawberry ice cream too!” he said. Ella just smiled at him. “Want some?” she asked, offering her cup to him Lego nodded his head, and took a spoonful of it. “Delicioius.” He said as he tasted it. Ella just smiled and continued eating. He leaned back as he watched her with a heavy heart. Maybe winning Ella’s love would be a tough thing to do.


“I have an idea!” Tiffany told Ella the next day. Ella looked at her seatmate. “Why don’t we go on a double date this weekend? It would be fun!” she said. Ella just sighed, and shrugged her shoulder. “I don’t know…” she said. Tiffany gave her a puzzled look. “Do you have a plan this weekend with Lego?”
“Not that I know of…”
“Then, it’s settled then! Let’s have a double date this weekend. We can watch a movie, or go to the amusement park, or shop! Hey… graduation ball is coming… we can take that opportunity to shop for something to wear!”

Ella just listened as Tiffany excitedly made the plans for the weekend. She wanted to say no. She wanted to bail out, and lie about having a plan this weekend with Lego. She knew she couldn’t bear seeing Chun and Tiffany, for it would only break her heart even more. Since she got together with Lego, she did her best to avoid her best friend. She knew she’s already at the point of getting over him, and she knew that if she saw him again, she would fall for him over again, and all her efforts to forget her feelings for him would be wasted.

“What do you say, Ella? It would be fun! I can help you find a dress for the graduation ball!” Tiffany said. Ella looked at her again, and let out a faint smile. “I… I’ll think about it, all right?” she said. Tiffany nodded her head, and then went back to her seat.


Boston University.

Lego stared at the writing on the envelope he is holding. His hands were shaking as he held it. He knew he have always wanted to get into this university, but he’s scared to leave everything behind, especially Ella.

“Lego, anything wrong?” he heard someone asked. He immediately put the envelope in his back pocket, and turned around. He saw Chun walking up to him. “Nothing.” He said. Chun gave him a worried look. “Did my best friend fought with you?” he asked. Lego shook his head. “We’re perfectly fine…” he answered. Chun just smiled and nodded his head. “Anyway… the girls wanted to go out this weekend. Are you free?” Chun asked. Lego gave him a confused look. “I mean, Tiffany and Ella…”
“Ella haven’t mentioned anything to me yet…”
“Maybe she just forgot. They want us to go on a double dat. And accompany them to buy their dress for the graduation ball.”

Lego nodded his head. “I’m in, don’t worry.” He said. Chun let out a big smile. “Great! I can’t wait to see Ella on Saturday!” he said. “Hey, you know what? Mr. Tang wanted me to help him out with some quizzes. I’ll catch you later, all right?” Lego said. He waved goodbye at Chun, and ran to the faculty room. Little did he know, the letter fell from his pocket, and Chun noticed it. He took the letter from the floor, and looked at it. “Letter from Boston University?” Chun thought. He looked at the direction where Lego is going, and then he stared back at the letter. Curious, he opened it, and was surprised to read it’s content.


“Awww… look at that cute puppy!” Ella said as she looked from outside the window of the pet store. She and Lego were taking a stroll that afternoon after school, and they passed by the pet shop. “It’s really cute! Just like you.” Lego said. Ella giggled at him. “Sweet talker!” she said. She looked at the window again, and watched as the puppy plays by himself. “You know what, I used to have a dog…” she began. “She was a pug, and she’s really really cute. I call her Snowpuff. I think she was with me since I was in fifth grade…”

Lego looked at Ella, and saw the sad look on her face. “She was like my second best friend. Every morning, she would jump into my bed, and lick me till I wake up. When I come home from school, I would always play with her. She is very special to me… I thought I could keep her forever… but then one day, Snowpuff got sick. We took care of her, and even had her see the veterinarian… I thought she will get well after that, but then… a few days later… she died…” she said. Lego held her hand as she speaks. “For weeks, I kept on crying for her loss… until one day… I finally stopped.”

Ella smiled at him. “Because I realized that even if she’s gone, she will always be here in my heart. We have memories together. Maybe… maybe Snowpuff became my guardian dog angel…” she said. Lego couldn’t help but laugh at what she said. “And… I’m thankful that for a short period of time, Snowpuff made me happy. Her mission on earth here is over, and that’s why God took her from me.” She said. Lego smiled at her, and cupped her cheeks. “You’re a strong girl…” he said. She shook her head. “I don’t think I’ll get through it all without Chun’s help. He was the one who told me those things. He was by my side when I was grieving for her death… he helped me through it all…” she said.

Lego was taken aback by what she said. He could feel his heart breaking upon hearing her say his name again. “Did you know, Chun was the one who gave me Snowpuff for my 10th birthday. She was like the third member of our gang. He was sad too when Snowpuff died… we both cried together when we found out that Snowpuff died.” She said. Lego just took a deep breath, and tried to smile.

He feels hurt that Ella would always unintentionally speak of something about Chun and their memories. He wanted to get all of her attention, but in the end, she would remember something about him. He couldn’t blame her, after all, they were best friends. But it’s her best friend that’s being a hindrance for him to be much closer to her, and make her love him. He doesn’t even know if he can make her forget her feelings for him, when all she talks about is Chun.

He was silent as they walked home. As they reached her gate, Ella turned to him, and smiled. “Thanks for a wonderful day, Lego.” She said. “I’ll see you tomorrow then...” he said. Ella nodded her head. He leaned down on her, and gave her a kiss on her forehead. “I love you…” he said. She just looked at him. She knew it’s easy to say those words, but she can’t tell him she loves him too, if it’s not what her heart feels. She knew she had been constantly hurting him by not replying, but she doesn’t want to lie to him. “Thank you.” She replied. Lego sighed, and nodded her head. He turned around, and walked away from her, feeling defeated, because for the nth time, he failed to hear those three words from Ella.

Meanwhile, Chun was standing outside his house, watching Ella and Lego together. Still, he couldn’t help but feel jealous whenever he sees them together. What hurts him the most is that as soon as she got together with Lego, she was starting to ignore him. As soon as Lego left, he gathered up his courage, and walked up to her. “Ella…” he called. Ella stopped walking, and turned to face her. She felt her heart beating fast as he got nearer to her. “Hey… how are you?” he asked. She looked away from him, avoiding his eyes. “Why are you avoiding me, Ella? Was there something I’ve done? Was it because of the last time? If you must know… Lego and I talked and – “

“It’s not that, Chun.” Ella interrupted. “I’m… busy… lately… and…”
“Too busy to say hi to your best friend?”
Slowly, Ella looked up at him, and she could see the hurt look on his face. “You’ve been with Lego for more than a week now. You’ve been spending too much time with him…”
“You’ve been spending too much time with Tiff as well…”
“And when I try to get close to you, you avoid me…”
“I… I’m just busy.”

Chun looked into her eyes, and then held her hand. “I miss you…” he said. “I miss you so much… that it hurts…”

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posted by kC @ 12:22 PM  0 Comments

Saturday, September 25, 2010
Say That You Love Me - Chapter 10

Green-Eyed Monsters

I ask myself that question a thousand times...
Why do I love you?
Why do I have to choose you?
Why does it have to be my best friend?
Why is it that every time I look at your face
I could only want you more?
Why can't I be her
And be the one that you love?


Chun got out of his house, and found Lego and Ella together. He knew that the two are talking, all right, but there was something in the way Lego held Ella's face. He walked closer to take a look at them.

“Then I'm willing to wait for that day, Ella.” Chun heard Lego said. Confusion clouded his mind as he walked closer. Lego's next actions made him more surprised. He leaned down and gave his best friend a kiss on the lips. He could feel his blood rushing up to his head. He clenched his fist at a sudden feeling of rage upon seeing that scene. Why is he kissing his best friend? Why is Ella letting him kiss her? Is there something going on behind his back?

He felt his eyes dimmed as he tapped his shoulder. Lego looked back, and without any warning, Chun threw a strong punch into his face. "Chun!" Ella shouted at him. She got down on her knees to help Lego up. He came back into his sense, and was surprised at Ella's reaction. She glared up at him as they stood up. "Why?!" she shouted angrily at him. "Why did you have to hit him, Chun? Lego have done nothing to you!" she said.

He have never seen her this mad before. He only hit him because he was doing something unnecessary to her, and he was just protecting her. "Ella, he kissed you!" he defended himself. "I let him kiss me, all right!" she shouted. That made him even more surprised. "Ella! Why? you can't let him kiss you, he's not even your -"

Then he paused. He stared at the two for a long time. Ella was looking worriedly at Lego. "Something is going on behind my back..." he thought. The anger was replaced by sadness upon seeing how close the two are. "Oh..." he muttered under his breath. She was avoiding Chun's questioning gaze. "I don't know what's happening anymore... I have been gone for a while, and then the two of you suddenly got close. I want to be mad, Ella... because I felt like you're replacing me with Lego... and then now... why did he kissed you? Are you two together now?" he asked.

Ella took a deep breath, and bravely faced him. "Yes. Lego is now my boyfriend." she said. Chun paled upon hearing her confirmation. "This... this have all been to sudden... why? I thought... Lego... he liked another..." Chun said. Lego sighed as he looked at his friend. "I just realized that I like Ella. I asked her out. She said yes. I asked her to be my girl, and she agreed." he said nonchalantly.

He glared at Lego. He knew he liked another girl, someone whom he knows that he could never have. He felt as if Lego is just using Ella as a rebound girl. He attacked Lego, and held him by his collar. "Do you think I will allow you to be with Ella, Lego? No way. Ella deserves someone much better, all right?" he said. Ella came to Lego's rescue, and tired to push him away from Lego, whch she did successfully. "Stop interfering with my life, Chun." Ella said. Chun looked at her, and she simply glared at him again. "This is my life. I'll date whoever it is I want to date. And I like Lego a lot. Just let me be happy, all right?" she said.

Chun was taken aback by what his best friend said. “You don't want me to interfere with your life anymore? What's going on, Ella? Are you really that mad at me?” he asked. “I am not mad at you! It's just that... you and me... we both have our different lives now... do you think it's about time that I stop depending on you? You can never be beside me forever, Chun.” she said. He looked at her furiously. “Do you really think that way? Ella, I promised you...”
“It was just a childish promise, OK? That's the truth. One day, the two of us will have to go our separate ways... it's just starting now.”
“That's the truth. We'll outgrown each other, Chun. You will have your own life, I will have my own. We need the space to grow...”

Chun looked at Lego, and then back at Ella. “I'm still your best friend, Ella. I don't know why you're acting this way. I just hope that you realize that your actions are hurting me.” he said in a hurt tone. Then, he turned his back and walked away from the two. Ella could only watch as Chun walks away from her. She regret what she have said. It was a wrong move to push her best friend away so that she could forget her love for him. She made a step forward to follow him, but she stopped herself before she could.

She felt Lego's hand hold hers. She looked at him, and there was an understanding in his face. “I won't stop you if you want to run after him, Ella... after all... he is still your best friend...” he said. She shook her head as she let out a faint smile. “This is my start...” she said. “I... I have to stay away from him so that I could unlove him, Lego... and... and you're here...”


Chun sat at the edge of his head, with a hurt expression on his face. Ella's words a while ago is still ringing in his ears. Why does he feel that his best friend is leaving him? Why does he feel that she doesn't need him anymore? He knew that since he and Tiffany got closer, Ella and Lego got closer as well. Seeing them together before, he couldn't deny the feeling of being threatened. But now that they are together, he felt even more jealous.

He clenched his fist, he curled up as he leaned his head on his knees. His heart is in pain because of what happened. Just when he found happiness with his dream girl, a mess like this would happen between him and Ella. He was so scared to lose her. He was so scared that he will be forgotten by the girl he was with all his life. “Ella...” he whispered. “We promised... you promised to be always be by my side... why do I feel like you're slipping away from me slowly? Why do I feel like you don't care for me anymore? Do you know how much I need you in my life? I feel like I can't breathe anymore...”

She stared at the picture frame by her bedside. She took it, and stared at his smiling face. “I'm sorry...” she thought. She bit her lips as she let a tear fall down on his picture. “Chun... do you know how much it pains me seeing you each day, as if I don't matter anymore? You have Tiffany know, and I'm left with no one. Before, I was just happy standing beside you and loving you silently, praying that one day you'll see me in a different light... but now...”

Ella closed her eyes as another tear rolled down her cheek. “I've lost you. I've lost you to her... and though I'm beside you, I feel like the distance between us is getting farther. I maybe near you, but I couldn't even let you know how much I do love you... it's hurting me, and I'm getting tired of all this pain. I'm sorry... I'm sorry for staying away from you. I'm sorry that I have to be with Lego... this is for the best, that I know. I can't stay friends with you if my heart keeps on loving you. I can never be the same Ella, your best friend, as long as this feelings stay... I'm sorry... I'm sorry...”

He put his hand on his pocket and let out a sigh. He kicked the can in front of him as he waled. This is supposed to be the happiest day of his life. Ella Chen, the girl he have loved since his first year in high school, have finally given him a chance to love her. He swore to himself that he will do everything to make her forget Chun, but it turns out to be difficult as he thought it to be. There was jealousy in Chun's eyes when he glared at him. There was longing in Ella's eyes as she watched him walk away. And though Ella stayed with him, he felt bad. Everything seems wrong.

Lego stopped walking and let out another sigh. “Ella... you've given me the chance... but why do I feel that you can't open up your heart for me? I wish that you'll look at me in the same way that you look at him. I wish you'll cry for me in the same way you cry for him. I wish I could just be Chun so that you could love me too... why does it have to be him, Ella? He is your best friend, yet he never knew how you really feel? He swore to protect you, yet he left your side the moment Tiffany walked into his life. I've been with you, silently looking after you, trying my best to make you smile, but still...”

He let out another groan. He looked down and saw a pebble by his foot. With all his might, he kicked the pebble away from him. He knew he should be ready for this moment when he asked Ella to be his girl, but he never thought that it would hurt more. And the only thing to do is endure the pain he is feeling.

He strummed on his guitar, playing on that one song again. He hummed along with it, and then suddenly, her innocent face came into his mind. He let out a smile, and just shook her head. Calvin Chen never believed in love at first sight before, but since that day at the chapel, he wants to believe it now. “Will I see you again?” he thought. He reached for his pocket, and took a white handkerchief with her name on it. She left it when she ran away from him at the chapel. When he saw her the following week, he was so shy to approach her and return the hanky to her. He laughed at himself. His friends did laugh at him before.

Being the star singer of the glee club and the main guitarist of their band, Calvin never had problems with girls. He was never shy around girls, actually, except for this high school girl who seem to have stolen his heart the moment their eyes met. “I definitely have to see you again, Ella... I have to...” he said to himself.


School have once again ended the next day.

As usual, Ella tailed Tiffany from behind. From the school gate, she could see Chun waiting for her. “Bye Ella! See you tomorrow!” Tiffany said as she waved goodbye. She just smiled faintly and nodded her head. She watched as she ran up to the gate. The moment the two met, she gave Chun a kiss on the lips. Chun smiled happily at him. She didn't want to see that scene anymore. She doesn't want to feel hurt anymore whenever she sees him together. She looked away from them, and decided to wait for Lego.

Chun looked inside the school gate, just In time when Ella looked away from him. He felt a flinch in his heart, seeing her best friend is still mad at him. “Ella...” he thought. He doesn't care anymore who's fault it is, or what have triggered them to be this estranged. He just wished that things can go back to the way they were – before he saw Lego kissing her, before he hit him, before Ella said those hurtful words, before he walked away from her. “Hon, let's go?” he heard Tiffany said. He looked down at her, and smiled. “OK.” he said.

As he put his arm around her, Lego came. The two just stared at each other for a long time. “He's here for Ella...” he thought. Lego sighed, and put his hands on his pocket. Chun looked at him for a long time. They have been friends for a long time, and it would be a stupid mistake to throw away their friendship just because he found out that he and Ella are together now. “She's inside...” Chun said. Lego gave him a puzzled look. Chun let out a sad smile at him. He felt a lump in his throat as he was about to speak again. “Take care of her, Lego. She's... she's too precious for me. If... if you hurt her, I could never forgive you.” he said. Tiffany smiled at Chun, and then looked at Lego. “I'm sure he would take care of Ella. She's in good hands, Chun. Don't worry too much about your best friend.” she said. Chun just nodded his head.

As Chun and Tiffany turned to leave, Lego began to speak. “I will take care of her, Chun.” he said. Chun paused for a while, and listened to him. “I will... love her... more than anything else in this world. I will.” he said. He looked back, and smiled again. “I know you will.” Chun said. As Lego watched them leave, he could feel the pain in his heart once again.

After they left, Ella came out of the school gate. She gave him a smile, and kissed him on the cheek. “I want ice cream.” she said. Lego smiled at her. “You have always loved ice cream.” he said. Then, she looked at Chun's direction. Her smile became a sad one as she stared at his back. She could feel the tears starting to form at the corner of her eyes once more. As Lego held her hand, he looked at her. “Ella...” he thought. “I wish you can only look at me...”

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posted by kC @ 10:47 AM  0 Comments

Saturday, September 18, 2010
Say That You love Me - Chapter 9


Since that day you kissed me,
I know a lot of things have changed
I knew I loved you more than ever
And I know how wrong these feelings are
And so I had to go on
To move on...
To leave your side silently


Chun walked Tiffany home that night after their date. As they reached her door, Tiffany turned to him and smiled. “Thank you for a wonderful night, Chun.” she said. He let out a boyish smile at her. “Thank you for a memorable night, Tiffany.” he said

The evening breeze gently blew to them. They stood still, gazing into each other's night. It was a special night for the two of them, something that they will never forget for the rest of their lives. He walked up to her closely. A gentle smile escaped from his lips as stared into her innocent face. As his face moves closer to her, he felt as if all the air he have sucked up inside have faded. She was breathtakingly beautiful. And her mere presence beside him had this effect on him.

The moment he longed for would come sooner, he knows. As she closed her eyes, he inched into her face once more. He could feel his heart beating fast, and his hands trembling as he held her by her sides. As he closed her eyes, their lips touched. It was their first kiss. With each seconds that their lips touched, he felt as if his world was spinning around. There were fireworks. He could swear he could hear the angels singing around them. He just loved the feeling of being this close to the girl he loves.

As he pulled away from her, he smiled shyly at her. There was silence between them, and they could understand each other with the mere smiles on their faces. “Uhmmm... I have to go inside now, Chun.” Tiffany said. Chun nodded his head. “Good night.” he said. “Good night...” she said sweetly. As she turned to open the door, Chun called her once more. She turned around, and saw him looking at her with love. “I love you, Tiffany.” he said. She let out a sweet smile, and replied. “I love you too, Chun.”


Ella heard a loud knock on the door. She turned down the volume of the TV, and stood up to open it. As she opened the door, she was surprised to see Chun smiling happily at her. “C-chun?” she stammered. “Ella!” he exclaimed happily. He grabbed her, and locked her small body into his arms. He hugged her tightly, so tight, that she could feel his heart beating furiously. “C-chun! I can't breath! What happened?” she asked. This time, Chun let her go.

He held her by her shoulders, and looked into her face. “It was the best date I had in my entire life!” he said. Ella sighed as she rolled her eyes. “Oh, please Chun... that's like your first date. You'll have another one of those great dates with Tiffany in the future...” she said. “But this one is the best. It went exactly as planned, and I know that she enjoyed it... and you know what made it more perfect?” Chun said. Ella gave him a puzzled look as she shook her head. “We kissed! I kissed her!” Chun said.

She felt as if someone drained all of her energy upon hearing what he said. Chun was way more excited with his first kiss with Tiffany, than that kiss they shared that afternoon. Maybe it meant nothing for him. After all, it was just kissing lessons for him, but for her, it will be something that she will treasure forever. She never regret that she gave her first kiss to her best friend, and the boy that she will always love.

She faked a smile to hide her sadness. “That's... good. At least the lessons paid off.” she said. She let out a nervous laugh. Seeing smile at her once more made her ever more nervous. “Thank you, Ella. I'm happy now because of all the things you've done for me. If it wasn't for you, I won't be able to meet the girl of my dreams, have her, date her, kiss her...” he said. Ella let out another nervous laugh. “Aiyo, stop it! I only did what a good best friend would do anyways. I...” She took a deep breath as she tried to smile. “I'm happy for you. Seeing this way, I'm contented. At least there's someone who loves you in the same way that you love them...”

He smiled. He took her hand, and pulled her into another hug. “For everything that you have done and will do for me in the future, Ella... thank you. I wish I could give you the same happiness that I am feeling right now...” he whispered to her. She was fighting the urge to let the tear roll down her cheek. “Then love me, Chun... love me... choose me... say that you feel the same way for me... because it's hurting me so much to see that I'm losing you... that giving you your own happiness is breaking my heart...” she thought.

She pulled away from him, afraid that he would finally see through her. She faked another smile as she pushed her away. “Now stop being too mushy, and go home.” she said. “But... but... I still want to talk to you!” Chun protested. “We'll talk tomorrow. We both need a shut eye!” she said. She yawned and stretched out her hand. “All this TV marathon makes me sleepy. I'll see you tomorrow, all right?” she said. Chun sighed, and nodded his head. “Fine, tomorrow. Good night, Ella.” he said. He walked up to her, and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

That left her into a daze. She touched the part of her cheek that he kissed as she watched him leave. “Why does unloving you seems so hard, Chun? Why is it that when I found the reason to stop wanting you, you give me a reason to love you even more?” she thought.


She looked back, and she saw her sister walking up to her. “Jie... it's nothing. Just a friendly kiss.” she said defensively. Joe let out a sigh as she shook her head. “But it's still a kiss, Ella. I don't want to see you kissing your best friend because I know it's hurting you more. And look... he have a girlfriend that he obviously love. You have to stop this, mei...” Joe said in a worried tone. Ella closed the door, and walked past her sister. “This will pass, jie. One day, I will start seeing him again as Chun... that little boy with drools when he sleeps.” she said with a laugh.

Joe looked sadly at her little sister. “You're only hurting yourself, Ella...” she said. Ella stopped, and looked at her sister. “I know...” she said. “You deserve someone better... someone who can love you more. And sadly, Chun is not the one that could love you. Chun only sees you as a friend. Do you think it's about time that you give other people a chance to love you as well?” she said. Ella just stared at her sister, pondering at what she just said.


It was Monday afternoon, and the class have ended.

Ella gathered all her things, and then turned to Tiffany. “Hey, Tiff... I think we should start with the research today. We can go to the library...” Ella said. Tiffany looked at her with a surprised look on her face. “Oh my God! I totally forgot about it!” she said. “It's OK... good thing I reminded you about it.” she said. Tiffany sighed, and shook her head. “Ella, can we schedule it at another time? Chun and I are going to the mall today... we already planned to meet up after school.” she said.

Any trace of emotion on Ella's face have disappeared upon hearing what she said. “But... we need to start on our research...” she said. “I know that, Ella... sorry I forgot, but I can't ditch my boyfriend. You understand, don't you?” she said. She looked at her, and she was giving her a sweet smile. She wanted to protest. She wanted to tell her that nothing is more important than making sure they'll pass Chinese History together. But there's nothing she can do, for it's Chun's happiness that's at stake.

“Fine.” she said in a stern voice. Tiffany's face lightened up, not hearing the hint of anger in Ella's tone. “I'll do the research today. I'll give you the topics that I'll be having a hard time with.” she said. “Don't worry, Ella! I'm sure Chun will help us out.” Tiffany said. “i don't want to be that dependent on him.” she muttered under her breath. Just then, she felt Tiffany hugging her. “Thanks, Ella! I promise to make up to you! You're a really good friend.” Tiffany said.

Before she went to the library, she walked Tiffany by the school gate. As soon as she saw Chun, she waved goodbye to her, and ran to him. Chun didn't even bother to wave hi to her. He was so caught up upon seeing Tiffany. She watched as he kissed her on the lips. She watched as he put his arms around her. She watched as he leaves her.

From now on, a lot of things will change, especially between them. She knew that the promise of forever he made to her is finally broken. He doesn't need her now, she thought. He already have Tiffany. He's happy with her. Someone else have came first in his life now. She is not his priority anymore. She is just a second best for him. He doesn't see her the way he did before, because he only have his eyes on Tiffany, and it hurts her the most. Her best friend is slowly taking her for granted, and she's scared that one day, she will lose him, and that he will be nothing but a stranger for her.

It was almost dusk when she finished. When she got out of the school gate, she found Lego standing, waiting for her. “Lego...” she said in a soft voice. He took a deep breath, and walked up to her. “I waited for you.” he said. Then, he let out a faint laugh. “I told myself I won't care about you anymore. But I can't bring myself not to. You're too special for me... I feel that it's my job now to look after you.” he said. There was an awkward silence between them. Then, he turned his back on her. “Come on, I'll walk you home, Ella.” he said.

Ella followed behind him. The whole time, Lego was not speaking to her. She could understand that he's still mad because she rejected him. But she have to be true to herself. She loves Chun, and she can't be with him. As they walked home, her thoughts were filled up with a lot of thoughts. Maybe, if Chun knew how she felt, he would do the same thing as she did – and that is to reject her love. She knew how she have hurt Lego, and she knew that she would feel the same way if Chun did the same thing.

“You're only hurting yourself, Ella...”

When she secretly loved Chun, she right from the start that it would hurt her. But she never thought that it would hurt her more, especially when Tiffany came into their lives. She wasn't ready for all the pain and heartaches that's associated with her unrequited love.

“Chun only sees you as a friend”

At least before, he sees her. Now, it's as if he was too blinded by Tiffany. She had long accepted the fact that they could never be together. That they will only be friends – best friends. But after that kiss, it changed everything. She wanted to be selfish. She wanted him by herself. But she couldn't do that... she loves Chun too much that hurting him would cost her heart.

“ it's about time that you give other people a chance to love you as well”

Her thoughts were interrupted when she realized that she was already in front of her house. “We're here.” Lego said. He turned to her and smiled. “You're home safe and sound, princess.” he said. She looked into his eyes, and she saw the familiar pain reflecting before her. She felt guilty. She wished she could do something to take it all away. “I'll get going now, dork. Hope to see you tomorrow.” he said.

She didn't utter a word as he walked past her. Then, she remembered something that her sister said. “You deserve someone better...” She looked at Lego as he walked away. He love her, she know that. He could give her all the love she ever wanted, and all she have to do is give him a chance. Maybe one day, she will learn to love him with all his heart.

“Hey...” she called. He looked back. She smiled as she walked up to him. As she stood in front of him, she lowered her head. “I'm sorry... for the last time...” she said in a soft voice. “I understand... you don't have to apologize...” he answered. “I know what you're feeling, because I'm feeling it too. And I know, it's unfair of me to reject you...”
“Chun will always be the one in your heart, and I understand. All I can do is be a friend to you...”

She looked up at him. And just like before, there was a spark of hope in his eyes. “I don't want to love him anymore...” she said softly. A tear fell from her eye as she speaks. “It... it has been hurting me constantly... and I don't want to feel this pain anymore.” she said. He cupped her cheek with his palm, and wiped the tears from her eyes. “Can I take away your pain? Can I try to make you unlove him?” he asked with a hopeful tone. She closed her eyes, and nodded her head. “Yes...” she said.

“I'm giving you the chance, Lego.”

He felt a tear fall down from his cheek. He smiled as he held her face. “You won't regret a thing, Ella...” Lego said. “I'll do my best so that you could forget your feelings for him. I'll always make you smile, the way that he does. I can be his replacement, his substitute... just be with me. I promise that...” he said. Ella held on to his hand, and smiled. “You don't have to do all those things, Lego. Just stay with me... I know one day I will learn to love you.” she said. Lego nodded his head. “Then I'm willing to wait for that day, Ella.” he said. He leaned down on her, and gave her a soft kiss on the lips. Then, he stared into her face.

Just then, someone tapped his shoulder. He looked back, and saw Chun looking furiously at him. The next thing he knew, Chun punched him in the face.

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posted by kC @ 11:07 AM  0 Comments

Saturday, August 28, 2010
Love Starts Here - Prologue


She stood before the old cathedral. Her eyes wandered around, as her mind tries to remember the first and last time she was here.

8 years?
6 years?

She could not remember how long.

But she could still remember the first time she came here. She ran around like a crazy woman. She sneaked in because she thought it was fun. But the silence of the empty cathedral was deafening her. She remembered the last time she was here as well. She walked out of that door with tears in her heart, and a heavy heart. And with all those times she entered this majestic structure, it only reminds her that those were the times she was with him.

She paused upon remembering him.


He was not the first man in her life. She have been with a few during her time. But he is definitely someone she will never forget – someone who will always have her heart. He will always be the man she have loved the most. She love her so much, that she would do everything for him. Everything, including letting him go in exchange for a brighter future he will have.

She knew she is not the right woman for him. She will never be the right woman for him. He was a perfect man, while she... she have a dark past. He have a bright future, while everything looks dim from her point of view. He came from the high society, while she is just a scum. She is a broken person, but what she will always be thankful for is that he loved her, and that love have mended her and made her whole again.

Her hands trembled as she reached for the knob. Slowly, she opened the door, and as the light entered the dark hallway of the cathedral, she found him standing by the altar. A tear fell from her eyes upon seeing him. She bit her lips as she slowly walked up to him. Her heart felt happy and scared at the same time. She doesn't know how he will react when he sees her again. Will he be mad like the last time? Will he blame her for ruining his life.

She made a decision to run away again. That's what she's good at anyways. She ran away from the reality that her life was a hell. She ran away at the time when she was hopelessly in love with him. She ran away because she knew she is just a burden for him. But every time she ran away from everything, she comes back to find that the thing she fears the most is still there. She turned her back, but then she felt someone stopping her. She looked back, and saw him. His pleading eyes looked straight into her. Unlike the last time, this time, it was filled with hope.

“You can't run away forever from me.” he said in a low but stern voice. “I will only hurt you again.” she said firmly. “Then why did you came back?” he questioned. “If you knew that you will hurt me, why do you have to come back? Do you know how long I've been praying for you to come back into my life? It doesn't matter if you hurt me so many times... because I love you. My life would be meaningless if you're not here...” he said.

She could clearly see the tear fall from his tender face. There was no anger, or hatred, unlike before. There is only hope that this time that she will stay. “Please...” he pleaded. His cracked voice made her heart flinch.

Will she stay, and let the love start?
Or will she go and end everything?

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posted by kC @ 10:32 AM  0 Comments

Sunday, August 22, 2010
So It's You - Part 7

Seasons passed by, and it was my third spring in the university.

I’ve waited for this season to come, and as soon as my classes are over, I ran up to the park, hoping to see her once again. And there she was, sitting on our usual spot. I smiled to myself as I walked up to her. But then, that smile slowly faded as I got closer to her. Her usual happy face was replaced with a sad one. Her thoughts seems to be somewhere else, as she never noticed that I was coming up to her. Her fingers fidget on her blouse, and her eyes was trying to control the tears from falling down her face.

“Hikaru…” I called in a soft voice. She looked at me. She bit her lips as the tears finally fell from her eyes. I sat next to her, and then she buried her face onto my chest as she cried. “Ya Lun…” she whispered as she sobbed softly. I stroked her hair as I embraced her into my arms. I let her cry on my shoulder, hoping that whatever she is feeling right now, it would ease everything with my embrace. “Grandpa… he…” she managed to say in between sobs.

At the start of that year, Rihito-sensei fell sick and was forced to take a leave. And maybe this is the reason why Hikaru is sad. She came here to see her beloved grandpa sick. “They… they said… they said grandpa will be… be….” Then, she cried again. Rihito-sensei is sick, and from what I’ve heard, his condition has worsened. I’m worried about Hikaru. From what I know, she became this way because of a tragedy that happened to her and her family. And now, there will be another tragedy that’s going to happen to them, and I’m not sure if she could take everything.

I walked her home, and we saw Aiba by the door. “Thank God, you came back…” he said as soon as he saw his sister.. I watched as Hikaru she retreat back inside the house. She looked so lifeless, like someone have taken out her soul. It was breaking my heart to see her like this. “Hikaru have been like that since she learned about grandpa’s condition…” Aiba said. I looked up at him, and he gave me a sad smile. “I thought that when she sees you, her depression would somehow lessen but… but I was wrong…” he continued.

I looked by the door, wondering how Hikaru was coping with everything. “She’s not used to this…” AIba said once again. “When we were young, we had a car accident, and she saw our dad die before her very eyes. Since then, she was never the same again. I’m afraid that if grandpa…” he paused for a while, and shook his head. “I wish things would not happen this way. I… I’m so worried about her.” He continued. What can I tell him? Can I tell him not to worry, for everything will be OK? I know not everything will be all right, and Hikaru will not be all right. I knew that a tragedy will soon struck their family, and she will never be ready for it. She will never be ready to lose her grandpa.


I walked inside the house, into Rihito-sensei’s room. He was sitting up with a book in his hand. He looked up at me, and smiled. “Ya Lun! I’m glad you were able to come!” he said. There was a weak smile on his face. I smiled back, and nodded my head. I walked up to him, and sat on a chair beside him. “It’s spring once again, isn’t it?” he asked. “It is.” I told him. He looked outside the window, and I can see the smile slowly fade from his face. “It’s funny how seasons pass us by without us even knowing it. I’ve lived into 70 springs, and here I am…”

He looked at me, and let out another faint smile. “An old, sickly and weak man.” He said. “I don’t think you’re that old, Rihito-sensei.” I told him. “I can’t deny it anymore, Ya Lun. I am old, and one day, I will have to go.” He said. He let out a sigh as he looked outside the window again. “All my life, I had regrets, about things that I didn’t do, and words that I didn’t say. When my son died, I was not able to tell him how much I love him, and how much he made me proud of him. When my wife died, I was not there beside her to see her go. When Hikaru and Aiba was born, I wasn’t there to witness their arrival. There are mistakes I made, things I forget to do, things I regret to do… but all in all it sums up life. The measurement of how well you lived your life is with the things you have said and done, with the mistakes and the lessons you learned, with the regrets and the what-ifs…” he said.

“Are… are you ready? Are you ready to go? To leave us all behind?” I asked. I could hear my own voice quivering as I asked that question. “It’s not a question if I am ready to go. I am ready to face my death. It’s a question if the people who loved you are ready to let you go when you die…” he answered. “Hikaru? What about her?”
“Hikaru will have to accept it. She have not accepted her father’s death, because she was not ready for it. As for me… I will do everything to make her ready for my departure.”
“But will Hikaru be able to accept it?”
“All my life, I prayed to find someone who could take care of Hikaru, who could love her the way that I do. Who could protect her, and accept her for who she is. I prayed for someone to be there for her when she needs someone, and they sent you to her, Ya Lun. Knowing that you will always be there for her, I will be at ease, and I could die peacefully knowing that my granddaughter is in good hands.”

I lowered my head as he speaks. It is a great honor for me that he chose me to take care of Hikaru. But now, more than ever, I am scared. Not for myself, but for her. I can be there for her, that’s for sure. But I’m worried that Hikaru will not be able to accept things as they are. “You will take care of Hikaru, right, Ya Lun?” he asked. I looked up at him, and let out a smile. “You have my word.” I replied. “I will look after Hikaru from this day, onwards.”


As the springtime passes by, Rihito-sensei grew weaker and weaker each day. I made sure that I am there always for Hikaru to make her feel at ease. I know it was hurting her as well to see her grandfather dying.

It was one Saturday afternoon, and we were at Rihito-sensei’s room. Hikaru was sitting on the floor, her head was on her grandfather’s hand. “Grandpa…” she called. “Hmmmm…” Rihito-sensei said in a weak voice. “Are you… are you… going to where papa is?” she asked. I heard Rihito-sensei let out a weak laugh. “I am, if God will allow me to be with your father…” he said in a weak voice. I looked at Hikaru, and saw a tear falling from her eyes. “Grandpa… when… when you see papa… will you… will you tell him that I love him?” she said. Rihito-sensei smiled. “I will…”
“Will… will you tell him that… that I’m sorry… for that night… because… because I….”

He turned to her, and patted her head. “Hikaru-chan… it was not your fault. You were not at fault that night. It was… an accident, and no one blames you for that…” he said weakly. She closed her eyes, and let the tears fall down from her eyes. “I’m going to miss you, grandpa… I know you’re tired… really, really tired… you can rest now… I promise I will be OK… I will try to be OK….” She whispered. “When I’m gone, I will still watch you from above, my princess. I will always look after you… and someone else will take care of you when I’m gone…” he said.

He looked up at me, and smiled. He mouthed a word of thanks to me as he consoled Hikaru. I took a deep breath, and smiled at him, and then I turned my back. I knew I had to be strong for them, especially for Hikaru. But at that moment, I wanted to break down and cry, but I can’t let them see how weak I feel inside. I don’t know if I could do it without Rihito-sensei. I don’t know if I could take care of Hikaru the way that he did for the past years. I don’t know if I had enough patience to be with her. But I know that I love her. And maybe he sees that love I have for her, that he is more than willing to hand her to me, to ask me to take care of her. But still, I’m scared. I’m scared that I will disappoint him, and that I will disappoint myself and Hikaru even more.

Maybe it’s OK to scared once in a while… and it’s OK to be scared at this moment.


Aiba and I were busy preparing breakfast, when we heard a loud cry at Rihito-sensei’s room. We looked at each other for a while, and then rushed to his room. As we opened the door, we saw Hikaru by the floor. She was holding onto Rihito-sensei’s hand, and she was crying. “Grandpa….” She cried. “Grandpa… why did you have to leave now? Why now? Grandpa…”

I felt like someone poured cold water on my back. I slowly walked onto Rihito-sensei’s bed. I saw him sleeping peacefully, with a smile on his face. “Rihito-sensei…” I whispered. I held his hand, and felt how cold it was. I knelt down, and put my ear onto his chest, trying to feel his heartbeat, but I couldn’t feel it. I could hear his heart beating. I couldn’t feel his slow breathing.

Rihito-sensei is gone. He left me, Hikaru, and Aiba. He left the people he loved the most. He left us without giving us a chance to say goodbye for the last time.

I bit my lips as the tears finally fell from my eyes. He was the father figure to me while I’m staying here at the uni. He was the one giving me words of wisdom, especially when I needed it most. And now that he is gone, I felt like a lost sheep. Life, I guess, will never be the same without Rihito-sensei.

I looked at Hikaru, who is still crying hard after knowing that her grandfather passed away quietly. I put my arms around her, and pulled her into a hug. Together, we cried for our loss. I knew that moment that she needed me, and I needed her as well. She needed to cry to me. She needed someone to hold her and make her feel all right. With her in my arms, I could feel all my fears slowly disappearing. I felt like there was nothing to worry about. It was as if being with Hikaru and take care of her is something I’ve always wanted to do for the rest of my life. I looked down at her, and she was crying on my shoulder. “Hikaru…” I whispered. I pulled her close to me, and let her cry even more. “Ssssshhhh….” I whispered ot her. “Hush now, Hikaru… I am here… I will always be here for you… you still have me… I won’t leave you, ever…”

From that moment on, I will have to take care of her. I will do everything for her. I promised Rihito-sensei that.

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posted by kC @ 11:45 AM  0 Comments

Sunday, August 15, 2010
So It's You - Part 6

The spring dance was held at the uni’s garden that evening. As we entered, I felt Hikaru held on to my hand tightly. I looked at her, and I could see the nervousness on her face. She looked at me, and I smiled. “Relax… you’re the most beautiful girl tonight.” I said. Her cheeks once again turned pink with what I said. “I feel like Cinderella already…” she whispered. “And I am your prince charming for tonight.” I said proudly.

All eyes were on us that night. I know most of them were surprised that I brought Hikaru to the dance. Just like before, some were talking behind our backs. “Ya Lun…” she called in a nervous tone. I looked down at her, and I could see how scared she is. “Why are they looking at us? Is there something wrong?” she asked. “They are looking at us because I’m with the most beautiful girl they have ever seen.” I said. She giggled at what I said.

I lead her to the dance floor, and a slow song began to fill the air. “Are we going to dance now?” she asked innocently. I nodded my head. “Didn’t the prince danced with Cinderella when he saw her for the first time?” I asked. She had that puzzled look on her face, which amused me the most. “But… this isn’t the first time you saw me.” She said. “It doesn’t matter. Cinderella is the prince’s first dance that night.” I said. “So, I’m going to be your first dance?” she asked again. I let out a laugh, and pinched her nose.

Then, she turned into a pout. “What’s wrong, Hikaru-chan?” I asked. “I…” she lowered her head. She fidget her fingers again, I know when she does that, there is something bothering her. “You don’t know how to dance?” I asked. She looked at me, and nodded my head. “Don’t worry, I’ll teach you. It’s simple.” I assured her. “What do I do?” she asked. “Just follow my lead.” I said. I held her hand, and put it on my shoulder. Then, I took her other hand, and hold it. I put my hand on her waist, and as the music filled the air once more, I leaned forehead on hers. “Make a step to your side…” I instructed her. She followed what I was doing. “And then make another step on the other side…” I said.

Before we knew it, we were slow dancing. I was gazing into her eyes as we danced. Whenever I look at Hikaru, it felt like the time always stands still, like we were the only people in the world. I felt like wanting to get lost into those big black orbs. I felt like gazing into her eyes forever. I could look into her gentle face, and not get tired of staring at her.

I thought of my life before she came into my life. I knew it was a boring one. All I did was to study, and to study is all I do all my life. My life felt empty, and I feel that I didn’t have any purpose, whatsoever. There was nothing exciting to look forward to. When Hikaru came, my once dull world was suddenly filled with colors. I look forward to each day of seeing her. I look forward to each springtime that we will be together. I never cared about someone as much as I cared for her. I had the urge to protect her, to always make her smile. She was the one who brought the smile on my face, the one who made me realize that life is not all work. She brought out the kid in me. I don’t know where I’d be without this girl. When she’s not with me, I wish I could fast forward to the day she’ll be here with me. When she’s beside, I wish that time would be much longer.

“Ya Lun…” she called in her soft, sweet voice. “Hmmmm…” I said with a smile. “I… I like you… I like you a lot…” she whispered. “I like you too… I like you a lot…” I whispered to her. She rested her head on my shoulder as we continued to dance.

Just having her beside me feels so good. Just having her in my arms feels so right. If loving her is wrong, then I don’t want to be right for the rest of my life.


My only mistake that night was I let Hikaru out of my sight.

I left her for a while to get her something to drink. Then, Gui Gui came up to me. “Ya Lun…” she called. It took me one look to realize that she is drunk. “Gui Gui.” I said. She smiled at me, and held on to my arms. “Ya Lun… be with me tonight, please… leave her… stay with me…” she said. I let out a sigh as I looked at her again. “I can’t Gui Gui. I promised her grandpa –“
“Then take her home and be with me!”
“I can’t. She is my date. I can’t abandon her.”

She pushed at me, and glared at me angrily. “Why her?!” She shouted. “Why her?! Why does it have to be that crazy girl?! I am much better than her!” she shouted at me. I closed my eyes, and took a deep breath. Then, I looked at her. “I explained everything to you, Gui Gui. What part of it can’t you understand?” I asked. “I can’t accept that I’m going to lose to a crazy girl like her.” She told me.

Just then, I heard a loud cry. I looked back, and I saw a group of boys making fun of Hikaru. They were circling her, while Hikaru was crying. I rushed to her to save her. “What do you think you’re doing?!” I shouted at the boys while pushing them. “Oooh, prince charming have some to save her little princess!” one of them said mockingly. I took Hikaru into my arms, as I protect her from the others. Everyone’s eyes are on us once again. Some were laughing. Some were making remarks. Some were worried. I looked at them, angrily. “You have no right to make fun of someone just because of their condition!” I shouted at them. “Who do you think you are, our father? And it’s your fault! Why did you have to bring that cuckoo here at the dance?” one of them said. “For a scholar like you, you sure are dumb.” Another said. “Cuckoo! Cuckoo!” another one teased.

I couldn’t control my anger anymore. I clenched my fist, and began to hit them. I swear I could almost kill one of them, if only Osamu and Da Dong did not come to pull me away from them. “Ya Lun! Stop it!” Osamu said. “Why are you acting this way just because of that girl?” Da Dong asked. I looked at him, then I looked back at Hikaru. Her head hangs low as she cries. She bit her lips as she looked up at me. “Hikaru…” I whispered. Just then, she turned and ran away from me. “Hikaru!” I called.

I looked at everyone who witnessed that scene. I was angry because of what happened. I was angry because they let her be hurt by their word. I was angry because they were making fun of her. I was angry because they could not accept her.

I was angry because I am hurting the most because of what they did.

“Why do you people have to judge someone because of the way they act?!” I shouted angrily at them. Everyone fell silent. “Are you all happy because you have hurt someone?! Huh?! Are you all happy that she ran away from me?! You don’t know her, all right?! You don’t know Hikaru the way that I do! You only proved to me that you guys are the worst… and that she is much better than all of you!” I could feel my tears in my eyes as I lash it out on all of them.

I took a deep breath, and walked away from them. I don’t need them, those kind of people. All I need is Hikaru.

I looked for Hikaru all over the place. Finally, I found her sitting by the stoop of a building. She curled into a ball, and as I got nearer to her, I could hear her muffled cry. I heart was aching to see her this way. “Hikaru…” I called in a low voice. She looked up at me. I could clearly see the crystal tears from her eyes. “Ya Lun… I… I’m sorry…” she said. I sat next to her, and then wiped the tear from her eye. “No, I’m sorry… I’m sorry that I left you alone. I’m sorry that I wasn’t there when they made fun of you.” I said.

I cupped her cheek with my palm, and gazed into her eyes. Why is the society so cruel to someone as gentle as her? It wasn’t her fault that she became this way. It wasn’t her choice at all. I could feel her pain. I could feel my heart being stabbed into a million pieces seeing her crying. I pulled her to my chest, and hugged her tight. I was wishing that by my hug, all the pain she is feeling would finally disappear. I hushed to her as she cried. “Ssssshhhh… don’t worry, Hikaru… I am here now… they can’t hurt you anymore. I won’t let them hurt you… you’re safe here with me…” I whispered to her.

We stayed that way for a long time. When I looked down at her, she was already sleeping peacefully in my arms. I smiled to myself as I looked at her. If only I could see her this at peace, then I would be happy. “I love you…. And I will protect you with all my life, Hikaru…” I whispered to her. I wish she could hear what I was saying. I wish she could understand what I feel for her. But she is still a child. I don’t know if she would be able to comprehend my feeling if I tell her about it.

I leaned down on her, and kissed her on her forehead. I felt her stir after I kissed her. She slowly opened her eyes, and smiled at me. I leaned down at her once again. I was ready to kiss her lips, but then we were interrupted by a loud sound and the light from the sky.


“Wow…” she said in awe. I saw that smile on her face again. It was as if she has forgotten her humiliation a moment ago. It was like everything is all right now, and that nothing ever happened. “It’s beautiful…” she said to me. As she looked at me, I smiled at her. “Yes, it is.” I said. I put my arms around her, and she leaned on my shoulder as we watched the fireworks together. As we watched the fireworks, I felt her hand reach my hand. She looked up at me, and smile.

Maybe… even without words… she understood how much I love her.

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posted by kC @ 4:01 PM  0 Comments

So It's You - Part 5

I walked the school’s hallway. I noticed the looks on the students’ face as I passed by them. I could hear them snickering. Some looked at me with pity. Some looked at me as if I assassinated someone. I could hear them talking behind my back. And I know the reason behind all of this – it’s Hikaru.

Rumors do spread like wildfire. Before I knew it, everyone knew that I turned down Gui Gui, the most popular girl in school, was turned down by me, Yan Ya Lun because of Rihito-sensei’s crazy granddaughter. I was mad. I was angry. Who are they to judge Hikaru, anyway? They never knew her the way that I do. They could never realize how special she is. The problem with people is that they easily judge a person because of how they perceive them to be, and not really get to know them better. Sometimes, I feel Hikaru is much better than these normal people, because she never judged them the way that other people judges her.

“Ya Lun!” I heard Da Dong call me. I stopped walking, and he came up to me, putting his arm around my neck. “So, I heard about your girl…” he said. I simply glared at him, but that did not stop him to make snide remarks. “She is Rihito-sensei’s granddaughter, no?” he asked. “Hikaru.” I pointed out. “Oh, yes… the seven-year-old girl? I never thought that you’re into… much younger girls… Aren’t you scared that you’ll end up in jail because of corruption of minor?” he said.

I feel my blood boiling on top of my head, but then I have to control my temper. “She is the same age as us.” I snapped at him. “So I heard. But… your girlfriend still acts as if she’s seven years old. Tsk tsk tsk…” Da Dong said. I stopped walking, and turned to face him. “Look, Da Dong.” I said in a firm tone. “If you can’t say anything nice to her, just shut the fuck up.”

I walked away from him. I was pissed off with his snide remarks about Hikaru. I hated the fact that one of my friends could be so narrow-minded like the rest of the people. If only they could see how Hikaru makes my day happy. If only they could see how I changed to be a better man because of her. Unfortunately for them.

That afternoon, I walked to the park, and as usual, I saw Hikaru sitting by the bench. The moment she saw me, her face lightened up. I know she waited a long time for me, because I know, I do. Seeing her just makes me forget all the ridicule and insult I had for the day. It was all worth it, for her. She stood up, and ran towards me. She put her hands behind her back, and swayed from side to side. “I’ve got a surprise for you!” she said in a sing-song tone. “All right, what is it?” I asked. “Guess.” She replied.

I let out a laugh. “Hmmm… let me see… a candy bar?” I asked. She giggled as she shook her head. “One of your origamis?” I asked again. She shook her head again. “What is it?” she asked. Slowly, she took her surprise for me from behind. It was a white teddy bear. “Here!” she said, handing it to me. I took the teddy bear from her hand, and smiled to myself as I looked at it. “That’s my favorite teddy bear, Ah Bu.” She said. I looked at her, and smiled. “Thank you. But… why are you giving it to me?” I asked. “When I feel lonely, I just look at Ah Bu, and talk to him. It helps me a lot. So, I’m giving this to you. Because… you seem so sad lately… and when I go back to Osaka at the end of spring, I know you’ll be sad like me. I have a lot of teddy bears like Ah Bu, but I know that you don’t have one. So I gave it to you… so that when you’re sad, all you have to do is look at Ah Bu, and then think of me… and then I will be there for you. I will be there for you even if I’m far away.” She said.

I stared at her for a long time. My Hikaru. My lovely and gentle Hikaru. Sometimes I wonder what is it that I’ve done to have someone like her in my life. I walked up to her, still staring at her smiling face. She was gentle and fragile. She shimmered under the sunlight. Sometimes, I felt that this girl standing before me is not human, but an angel sent down to save me from my life. “Thank you…” I whispered to her. I pulled her into a hug, and hugged her tightly. I closed my eyes as my fingers brushed through her curly hair. For that one moment, I wanted her to be mine, to make her feel my heart. I wanted so much to tell her that I love her, I wanted to so much to kiss her to let her know how I feel, but I was afraid that would scare her away.

“Ya Lun…” I heard her call my name. “Hmmmm…” I said as hugged her close to me. “I… I like you…” she said. I let out a smile. “I like you too… “ I whispered into her ear. I closed my eyes once again, and let myself feel her warmth. I wanted to be this way forever. I wanted to be with her forever.


I sat in front of Rihito-sensei. The chess pieces before me stood still in their place, as I determine what move I’m going to make. Saturdays have always been a chess day with Rihito-sensei, and it also gives me an opportunity to spend more time with him and Hikaru. I have no more moves left. I have a few pawns, a bishop, my king and my queen left, and any minute now, I know he will beat me again.

“I know what you’re thinking, Ya Lun.” He said with a smile. I gave the older man a puzzled look. “You are thinking of a way to protect your queen.” He said. I nodded my head. “For sure, when you make your move on me, it will be checkmate.” I said. “When we play chess, you always tend to protect the queen….” He said. He made a move, and I thanked heavens it was not checkmate. “You sure do love your queen. And you sure are protective of her.” Rihito-sensei commented. He looked up at me, and smiled. “And I understand why. Because without a queen, a king is nothing.” He said.

I gave him another puzzled look. “Rihito-sensei…”
“Do you believe in the saying that behind the success of man, is a woman?”
I nodded my head.
“And do you believe that behind a man’s change is a woman who made him change for the better?”
I stared at him for a long time. “I don’t understand…” I finally said, moving one of my pawns. “A man will not protect a woman with his life without a reason. And the reason will always be one thing.” He let out another laugh as he moved his king. “Love.” He said. He let out a sigh as he looked up at me. “Love will always be the reason for everything, right, Ya Lun?” he said. I nodded my head. “And when you’re in love, you don’t have to find a reason why. You love because you feel love.” He added.

I wonder if Rihito-sensei have been hinting about my feelings for his granddaughter. Would he be mad? Would he think that I’m taking advantage of his granddaughter? Would he ask me to stay away from her? “Have you ever felt the need to protect someone, Ya Lun?” he asked again. “If I do, does it equate to being in love?” I asked. He shook his head. “There are times that you need to protect someone because it is your obligation. There are times that you protect someone because you felt that you have to. And there are times that you need to protect someone because it comes to you as an instinct to protect that person.” He answered. “So, which among them is love?”
“I ask you… which of them do you think is love, Ya Lun?”
“If it’s an obligation, I don’t think it’s love. If you feel that you just have to protect someone just because you felt that you have to, I don’t think it’s love either. Maybe when protecting someone becomes an instinct, it is equal to love?”
“You’re wrong.”

I looked up at him, and saw him make another move on the chess board. “You love someone, and you protect them because you know that having them without you by your side will hurt you. When the one you love is hurt, the pain you are feeling is a hundred times of what that person feels.” He said. I glanced up at him, and saw his lips turn into a smile. “When you hear people say something bad about Hikaru, why do you easily get mad? Is it because you are hurt with what you’re hearing?” he asked. “They never knew Hikaru in the same way that I know her.”
“But you are hurt as well. You are hurt, even though Hikaru could never hear what they say… You protect Hikaru from them because you are hurting for her.”
“And because I protect Hikaru…”
“It means that you love my granddaughter.”

I froze in my seat. Rihito-sensei knew what I really feel for her, and I don’t know what will happen next. “For the past ten years, I’ve been praying to the gods. I’ve been praying to them to watch over Hikaru. I am an old man, Ya Lun, and I don’t have much time here on earth. I can’t always be there to protect her.” He said. “There will be other people willing to protect Hikaru as well. Maybe you just have to give them a chance.” I told him. He let out a laugh, and then he stood up from his seat. I watch him as he retreat back to the kitchen. “The spring dance is in a weeks’ time, isn’t it?” he said. “Yes.” I answered. He looked back at me, and smile. “I bought a lovely kimono for Hikaru for the dance. I hope you’re still interested in taking her to the dance.” He said.

My smile widened upon hearing what Rihito-sensei said. Finally, he agreed to let me escort Hikaru to the spring dance. “I still am.” I said. “Thank you, Rihito-sensei.”


The spring dance came.

I waited in Rihito-sensei’s living room. I could feel my heart beating fast with each second that passes. I’m waiting for Hikaru to come out, so that we could go to the dance together.

“Ya Lun…”

I heard that familiar voice. I stood up from my seat, and saw her – my lovely Hikaru. She was wearing a pink kimono with sakura design. Her long curly hair was tied behind, and flowed through her shoulder. The child in her seem to have gone, and was replaced by a young lady. She was lovely – much lovelier than the beginning of spring when I saw her once again.

I was speechless as she walked up to me. She smiled at me, and at that moment, I felt that my world stopped. When I didn’t respond to her call, the smile faded from her lips, and she lowered her head. Her fingers fidget on her kimono. “I… I…” she stuttered. She shyly looked up at me, and I smiled at her. I held her by her shoulder, and looked into her eyes. “You’re beautiful tonight…” I said. Those words were enough to put the smile back on her face. “Grandpa bought it for me!” she said gleefully. She twirled around to let me see how beautiful her kimono is. “Look! Do I look like Cinderella now?” she asked me. I nodded my head in awe. “More beautiful than Cinderella.” I said.

“And since you are Cinderella tonight…” I heard Rihito-sensei said. He looked up at me, and smile. “I expect my princess to be back by midnight.” He said to me. “I will take her home before midnight.” I assured him. I looked at Hikaru, and smiled at her. I extended my hand to her, and she took it excitedly.

This will be a memorable night for the two of us. That, I know.

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