Chapter 11- Heartaches
A tall figure walked along the hospital lobby. Only the sound of her heels were being heard around the place. She stopped walking as soon as she saw the nurses' station. She took off her shades as she watched her talk with a colleague, she must have disturb the two with her presence, for as soon as they looked up at her, her colleague said goodbye to her, and left. “You must be Kelsi?” she asked. She looked up at her and nodded her head. She smirked at Kelsi. “I don't think I have to introduce myself anymore...”
“You don't have to. I know who you are...”
Yi Quan woke up the next day with a throbbing headache. He sat up from his bed as he massaged his head, then he realized that he was naked. He looked to his side, and he saw Ah Sa sleeping peacefully beside him, also naked. He shook his head upon realizing just what happened last night. He felt more guilty than ever. How could he sleep with her, and make love to her? How could he betray the girl who loves her?
After a while, he felt her move. He looked down at her, and watched as she slowly opened her eyes. The moment she saw him staring at her, she smiled. “Good morning, honey...” she said. Then, she sat up on the bed and reached for him to kiss on the cheek. Before her lips could touch his cheek, he turned away from her. “What's wrong with you?” she asked. “This... this is wrong, Ah Sa...” he said in a low voice. She reached for his face, and pulled it towards her. “No, it's not, Yi Quan. I love you... and I know you still love me...”
“You just don't understand. I can't love you anymore... because...”
Ah Sa waited for his answer, but he just turned away from her again. He stood up from the bed and walked away from her. “Ah Sa... please leave now before someone could see us together.” he said. “But why? You just have to tell me, Yi Quan. Tell me why can't you love me again?” she asked in a demanding tone. Yi Quan looked back at her. “Because I have someone else... someone who love me more than anything else, and I just can't hurt her...” he finally answered.
She looked up at him. She could sense Yi Quan's guilt – not to her, but to someone else. She thought that when she comes back, she would easily have him back as well. Though she cheated at him, she said to herself that she would do everything to amend her mistakes. She now realizes it's harder than she thought, because there is another girl between them. “Do you love her more than you loved me?” she asked, with a hint of hurt in her voice. Yi Quan turned to her. He paused, not knowing what to say to her. He love Kelsi, he is sure of that. But what he's not sure is who do he love more. Ah Sa's sudden appearance just made him more confused, because all the feelings he have for her, all the love he felt for her, all of it suddenly came back. It didn't help much that he made love to her just last night.
Ah Sa stood up from the bed, covering herself with the blanket, and walked up to him. She have to prove to herself that she still stand a chance with this man. Then, she reached up to him and kissed him passionately on the lips, and he did not resist at all.
That morning, Kelsi was trying to call Yi Quan on his mobile phone, but it seems that he turned his phone off. She called him at his home, but nobody's answering as well. “Where is he...” she thought. She sighed. She could sense something... her instinct is telling her something... but she doesn't want to believe it. A while ago, she turned the TV on, and the news she saw is all about Ah Sa coming back, and she making a movie with Yi Quan. While watching the news, she felt as if someone poured cold water on her. She wanted to think that Yi Quan got together with Ah Sa, but she dismissed at that thought. She trusts him so much, and she know she would never do that to her.
Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard someone knock at the door. She stood up from the couch and opened it. It was Jian Hua. “Good morning!” he said, smiling at her. He put the bags he is holding in the air to show it. “I brought breakfast.” he said. Kelsi just forced a smile, and let him in. Jian Hua noticed how worried and sad she looked like. “Anything wrong?”
“No... nothing's wrong, Wallace.”
“Then why are you so gloomy?”
Kelsi didn't looked at him, nor answered his question. “Is it because he stood you up last night?” he asked again. This time, Kelsi looked up a him. “How... how did you know?” she asked. “I never left the hospital till someone came for you. Too bad, it wasn't superstar but just his assistant...” he answered. Kelsi just lowered her head. “He's just busy, I guess... “ she said. Jian Hua gave her a stern look. “Stop making excuses for Zuo Yi Quan, Kelsi.”
“I'm not making excuses for him. It's the truth...”
“Then why did he denied you in the public? How can you make an excuse for what he did?”
Kelsi did not answer him. Instead, she turned away to him again. “I'm not making excuses for him...” she said in a low voice. “I'm just saying what I think... because...” then, she turned and looked him straight into his eyes. “I don't want to think that something's going wrong between us...” Jian Hua gave her a startled look. “What do you mean?”
“She's back... the girl he once loved...”
“Tell me, who is she?” Ah Sa asked Yi Quan as she hugged him tight. They were lying on the bed after making love again that morning. Yi Quan just stroked her hair as he kissed her on her forehead. “Kelsi...she... she's the most amazing girl I've met. When I met her, it's as if I've known her all my life...” he answered. Ah Sa looked up at him. She could feel a sting in her heart as he describe this girl, Kelsi. “Do... do you really love her that much?” she asked again. Again, he didn't answer her question. Ah Sa hugged him tighter. “I know I still stand a chance, Yi Quan. I'm not giving up on you...” she said. Even if she have to hurt someone's feelings, she'll do it just to have Yi Quan by herself.
Jian Hua and Kelsi found themselves standing in front of Yi Quan's pad. “Are you sure about this?” Kelsi asked him as she held the doorknob. “This is the only way we could find out if your instincts are right or not...”
“But this means I don't trust him...”
“Or would you rather get crazy with your thoughts?”
Kelsi didn't argue with him anymore. Slowly, she opened the door. She could hear Yi Quan's laugh... but he's not alone. She peeked inside, and she saw him on the table having breakfast. He was having breakfast with someone... and that someone is Ah Sa. She saw how Yi Quan smiled at her. She saw how he fed her. She saw how she lovingly kissed her on the lips. She fought the tears from falling from her eyes. She put on a brave front as she faced Jian Hua. The last thing she wants is for him to see her in pain. She forced a smile as she turned to him. “Nothing's there.” she said as she shrugged her shoulder. But, Jian Hua didn't believe her. He held the door, wanting it to open wide. “I said nothing's there, Wallace!” she said. 'Then, let me take a peek... will you?” he told her. “I thought I heard something...”
Before Jian Hua could open the door, Kelsi held his hand to stop him. “Please don't...” she said. She looked up at him, her eyes, pleading him. Wallace just gave her a stern look, as if saying to let him handle the situation. Then, she let him go, and walked away from him. Jian Hua watched as Kelsi left. Nothing could stop him now to find the truth. He opened the door wide, and the two lovebirds inside the pad looked at him with surprise...
Yi Quan and Ah Sa were startled as they saw Jian Hua by the door. He could see the anger in his eyes as he approached them. “Jian Hua...” Yi Quan muttered. Before he knew it, Jian Hua let out a strong punch, which made him fell on the floor. “What are you doing?” Ah Sa shouted at him. She came up to Yi Quan, and helped him up. Jian Hua just ignored Ah Sa, and faced Yi Quan once again. “That's for breaking Kelsi's heart.” Jian Hua said in a hard tone. With that, Jian Hua turned to leave.
Kelsi walked back to her apartment. This time, tears can't help falling from her eyes. Her thoughts were still filled with the scene she saw at Yi Quan's pad that morning. Her gut feel was right. Something is going on, and something is bound to go wrong. When she saw him kiss her back, she felt her heart broke into a million pieces. It's as if she can't breathe because of the pain she's feeling. Her eyes were blurred because of her tears, and she could not think straight. She absentmindedly crossed the street, not knowing that car was fast approaching her. She heard a loud honk from the car, and before she could move, she felt someone pull her back. Someone hugged her to protect her from being hit by the car.
As soon as the car left, she turned her back to find Yi Quan. He looked at her with the sorry look on his face, but she didn't bother looking up to him. Instead, she walked as fast as she could away from him. “Kelsi!” she heard him call her. But she never looked back or stop. She could feel that Yi Quan's following her. She just continued walking away from him. “Kelsi... please stop... let me explain...” she heard him say. This time, Kelsi stopped and looked at him as he walked towards her. “Let's talk... please...” he pleaded.
“She's back... isn't she...” Kelsi began. Yi Quan looked at her and nodded his head. Kelsi let out a faint smile. “I knew it...” she mumbled. “It's not what you think, Kelsi...” he said. This time, Kelsi looked up to him. “But something must've happened, right?” she asked. Yi Quan became quiet. “Is she asking you to take her back?” she asked again. Yi Quan slowly nodded his head again. “Are you going to take her back?” she asked. She was hoping Yi Quan would say no. she was hoping Yi Quan would tell her she was just thinking too much, that nothing will ever change between them even if Ah Sa's getting in the way. “Kelsi... I...” he began. “I'm confused now... I'm more confused now more than ever...”
“But you love me, right?”
“I do love you Kelsi... believe me...”
“But whats wrong? Tell me you're not coming back to her...”
This time, Kelsi can't help but breakdown in front of him. Yi Quan took her into his arms, and embraced her. “Kelsi, listen to me...” he said. “You're the last person I want to see hurting because of me... but I needed the time and the space to think things over. I love you, I really do. But when I saw Ah Sa... I got confused... I'm sorry...”
“Do you still love her?”
She waited for his answer. She watched him as he closed his eyes. He slowly nodded his head. “I realized I never stopped loving her...” he said in a low voice. He opened his eyes to find tears on her eyes. It pained him more to see her cry, but he just have to admit to her what he feels inside. He didn't want to lie to her, because he knows it will complicate more in the future if he lied to her. He reached for her face, and wiped the tear on her cheek. “I'm sorry that I have to put you through this pain. I'm sorry that I was not strong enough. I just need to think things through... I assure you and I promise you we'll get through this... just give me time...” he said. He could already feel the tears falling from his eyes. He never thought everything would end up this way. He never thought that there would come a time that he will be unsure of how he felt for her. Kelsi cupped his cheeks with his hands, and stared into his black orbs. “I will give you time if that's what you want... I'm willing to wait for you... but you have to make up your mind soon because... because it's breaking my heart...” she said. “Call me selfish, but I'm not willing to lose you... I won't give way to her. I won't give you up for her...” Then, Yi Quan moved closer to her. He kissed her lips, hoping it won't be for the last time. After their long kiss, he stood up and started to walk away from her.
“You are not selfish Kelsi...” he thought. “I am the one who's selfish...”
“What do you want to talk about?” Kelsi asked as soon as she and Ah Sa settled in a cafe. “It's about Yi Quan...” she said. Kelsi just looked at her. She knew what's going on her mind. “What about him?”
“I love him, Kelsi...”
“I love him too.”
“I want him back in my life...”
“One day, Yi Quan will decide who between us should stay in his heart. He will choose who between us whom he love more.”
“He is my life, Kelsi...”
Kelsi just looked at her, then she shook her head. “If he is your life...” she began. “Why did you have to betray him? Why did you have to leave him and went away with his best friend?” Ah Sa just lowered her head, unable to answer what Kelsi asked her. “I know I have no right to pry into your life, and whatever happened before between you and Yi Quan, it's the past and it's none of my business anymore. I am with him now. I'm not going to give him up to you.” she said. Ah Sa then looked to her and gave a faint smile. “Yes, you're right. Whatever that happened before... it's none of your business. But I'm back. I'm willing to do everything for him to forgive me. And like you, I'm going to fight for what I feel for him.” Ah Sa said. With that, she stood up from her seat, and began to walk away from her. “Then, may the best woman win.” she heard Kelsi say. Ah Sa stopped and faced her again. “Yes... and I know he will chose me.”
“After all...” she continued. “I know he still have feelings left for me...”
Labels: fan fic, Star